Cow Sai....

Got it from someone.. just a stress reliever..enjoy
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SOCIALISM : You have 2 cows, so you give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM : You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM : You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM : You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM : You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

PUTRAISM : You have two cows, the State takes one and gives it to your putra neighbour. From the milk you sell from the remaining cow you buy a bull and mulitply your herd. The State takes 30 per cent of your herd as it grows and give them to your putra neigbour. Your neighbour has a kenduri each time they receive a cow.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION : You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM : You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.

A FRENCH CORPORATION : You have two cows. You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION : You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION : You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION : You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION : You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows because you're sobering up and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION : You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINA CORPORATION : You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION : You have two cows. You worship them

A BRITISH CORPORATION : You have two cows. Both are mad.

Being a Fillial Son

My dad has always been a leading light to me. Even though we weren't rich, we ate like kings. I understood prudence, being responsible and being a loud mouth from him. At the times he treats me like a friend, at times his worst enemy and at times; as a son.

My dad has been in and out of the hospital for the past 14 months. His longest stay was 43 days. Needless to say, he is a very very sick man. Like they say, the bigger you are; the harder you fall. His ego is unmatchable, his pride even I cant match up to him. So when he was sick; you could see the once great man destroyed, vanquished. He couldnt walk, he just lay down on his hospital bed. I changed his diapers everyday when I was back from UKM last time. He didnt thank me at all. I agreed with him, it was my responsibility after all.

His condition has improved since, but frustration has gotten the better of him. As a friend of my put it the other day, he is a loose cannon now. Spitting out angry, venomous remarks without a care for the world nor the company he was with. That made me boil over.

We are like cats and dogs stuck in a small pound. I cant stand his outright illogical demands, he cant stand my outright impudence. I was being very rude to him all of a sudden, a simple yes or no question can turn into a shouting match involving sticks and knives. That was the degree of our disagreements. I hated him for once, he is not the man he used to be.

Today, as I was eating Hokkien mee near the jelutong post office in the morning, the hawker asked me; where was your dad who used to buy noodles for you every morning? I responded with a mellow explanation on how he was in and out of the hospital for 14 months for multiple illnesses. Then suddenly, it struck me; I have always been the apple of dad's eye. He loved me alot when I was younger, why the hell am I treating him that way? He used to give in to my illogical demands, he used to do whatever I wanted him to do. Why cant I treat him the same now? Why must I treat him like he's a beggar on the street? I love my dad...but why am I tormenting him further with all his illnesses and all?

That made me realise that I need to be a better son from now on. Fight and argue less with him,give him some leeway as his my father and try very hard, once again to be a fillial son. Dad, i love you. I promise I will give my all to be a better son.